Emotional Neglect and Infidelity: Understanding the Silent Struggles of Good Men

Have you ever wondered about the hidden battles fought by good men within the confines of their marriages? We often point fingers at them when they stray with an addiction or leave their women, but let’s pause for a moment. If we understand the concept of cause and effect, we might draw some facts that will save a lot of relationships from unnecessary ruin. Understanding the Silent Struggles of Good Men: Emotional Neglect and Infidelity in Marriage is a short concise article highlighting how emotional neglect and can push men towards infidelity, and how you can help prevent it.

Now, I do not in any way condone infidelity no matter the reason. It might also be good to mention that everything written here refers to good upright men with integrity. Not the common playboys or serial cheaters who also become serial lairs.

In the intricacy of marriage, women often play a pivotal role. They are the backbone—the silent architects shaping the emotional landscape. But what happens when that influence turns toxic? When actions, characteristics, and temperament become a double-edged sword, capable of both ruin or redemption? A toxic careless woman has the power to ruin and detour an otherwise good man. We say behind the success of every man is a woman. Well, the opposite of that remains true if we stand for objectivity. 

Man is suffering and Woman don’t know it, was the title of a book I read several years ago in my late teens. What a book to read as a teen! Still can’t recall motivation, perhaps I might have been intrigued by the title. Well, it reflected what has been proven today that despite society painting men as stoic, superhuman pillars of strength…and money, they grapple with emotional needs more than anyone cares to admit. 

Today, men are in search of emotional value and attachment just as much as they are in search of good sex. If you miss this point as a woman, you might satisfy only a percentage of your man’s needs. And the other percentage? Well, if he doesn’t die an unsatisfied man living under your shadow, he might be getting that percentage elsewhere. 

So, ladies, listen up. Missing this point might leave your man partially fulfilled and yearning for more meaningful connections to fill the emotional void. Unfortunately, she that has a man’s heart truly owns him. You obviously understand that sex can be obtained anywhere, right?

Imagine a man living in the shadow of unmet needs. He might not die physically, but his soul withers. If he seeks solace elsewhere, it’s not merely infidelity—it’s survival. The unsatisfied heart seeks refuge beyond the familiar, desperate for emotional sustenance. So think about where your man is emotionally while you are demanding for chic nails, goddess hair, a flashy new wardrobe and money to impress your peers. How meaningful is your relationship beyond your twerking skills and his ability to spoil you? What is he to you really?

A close look at the five human basic needs rank belonging and love third on the pyramid. A sense of belonging comes with being seen, heard, understood, accepted, respected, embraced, and supported. Do you give your man a sense of belonging?

Let’s be clear: Cheating is a vice I personally condemn. I’ve been cheated on before and trust me, I literally paused the earth on it’s axis in despair…well, your area of habitation wasn’t affected of course. So, this writeup isn’t about encouraging infidelity in men. If you are a man reading this article and thinking of cheating, look at some practical reasons why you might want to change your mind and go home.

This article is more about empathy and reflection. In this era of material gain, are we attuned to the struggles faced by our men? Are we nurturing their emotional well-being? Your man could be out there looking for an emotional connection because you feel your bed skills are all he ever needs. Don’t give him reason to fall into the trap of infidelity before you self-reflect to access if you have embraced his emotional side.

Give him room to be emotionally vulnerable with you before someone else gives him that shoulder. If you’re looking for ways to love your man better, take a look at How to make your happy. Just protect yourself while taking on this quest, make sure you don’t lose yourself while trying to show for your man.

If you have read this far, you might know that your man is a jewel worth and you would want to support him in every way he needs you. I’m supper proud of you. To get you started, reflect on the following;

• Are you listening to your man’s silent cries? This might require you to notice signs of distress in your man like a sudden changes in his drinking habits, sleeping habits, or irritability levels. Instead of retaliating, get to the root of the behaviour.
• Think about how attentive you are to his emotional needs. Ditch the idea that your man is emotionally strong. Even superman had emotional needs. Think of the ways he’s always reaching you emotionally and try to reciprocate. We might want to quit being emotional parasites as women and think about how much we can refill the cup we drink from.
• Are you aware of the weights he carries? Home, family, work, or interpersonal struggles.
• Are you aware of any insecurities he might be dealing with? These could include concerns about body image (intimate size inclusive), self-esteem, societal perceptions, his ability to provide as expected, and his capacity to meet the expectations of you, himself, his family, and society.